Pippy and Quarter
by Emerald Sonata
Summary: What happens when you pit a Halfling Druid who is scared bootless in leaving her home to find a cure, against a honest and humble Wizard who has a penchant for lying with a straight smile. Let's begin their misadventures.
1. Chapter 1

_**Dungeons and Dragons owned by Wizards of the Coast**_

 _ **Fanfiction and Characters with * by: Emerald Sonata**_

* * *

 **DnD Diaries:  
~PIPPY AND QUARTER~**

 _ **-d1-  
"Quest"**_

* * *

"Pippy. We are dying."

I couldn't answer. Even when the Chieftain of my Halfling clan called out to me personally, to see him in the Main Chamber Tent of our small village.

I was in the presence of no one but the Village Chieftain, his body wrapped in thick bandages. I could see red spots seeping through the cracks. I knew the bandages were not loose, I personally bound them myself.

The situation was this bad.

"The disease is spreading. It's effecting all creature and beings alike. We Halfling folk are no exception."

"I-I am aware of that, Sir Chief. I-I did my best to create as many remedies as possible to instill the ailment, but no avail. I hate to say it, but I am only glad it affected half of the village and not all. If I'm correct, this disease is selective."

"Either way, it's eating us alive. No medicine, no matter how ancient the magic it carries, can't seem to break it."

"I confess, I don't know what to do."

I held back the urge to cry. It's a bad habit of mine. Whenever I come across a problem, I would always end up crying. Success, failure, it doesn't matter. Of course, I cry harder when I screw up and people yelled at me.

Right now, I feel like crying enough to fill the Great Thane River… it was noted to be the 3rd largest river in the country.

The Chieftain coughed, breaking me out of my thoughts, and all I could do was grip my stick. It was a club I found in the forest when I was a wee lass. It fell out of a tree and took out a wolf that was about to eat me, so I considered it a lucky tool. So, I took it in as if a child.

Strangely, this club looked battered. As if it was the ones humans would use to beat an disobedient dog.

I cringed, thinking of both that horrible idea if not how the chieftain was suffering.

There's a side of me that urged my hands to put him out of his misery.

"Pippy."

I stayed my hand when he called out to me.

"Yes, Sir Chief."

"You must seek out the King of the Opal Nation. Not only does he possess the necessary power and wisdom to guide our country, his home keep is the most advanced in science and magic. Surely, he and his court wizards would have come across this plague and developed a divine antidote to cute it. I know he is not a selfish person."

"… Impossible."

"I know. But it must be done. And you are the only capable one I can trust."

"Which is exactly what I mean by impossible. This adventure will kill me."

No matter how many times the Chieftain begged me, I know this little quest he's giving me was a losing cause.

I was the youngest member of the village. Ever sine the plague appeared, no one dared to even think about giving birth to a new child.

We've dug out too many burials the size of a cabbage. We can't bring ourselves to make anymore.

I was among the few in the village who was not affected by the plague. Another small minority who could wield the power of magic. Actually, I was the only one who could use magic.

I was a Druid… but that didn't make me capable of fending for myself. The moment I leave the village, I was more than dead.

"Pippy. I understand your fears. But you need not do this alone."

"I doubt the other races would help a measly Halfling clan like us."

"Of course not. But that does not mean they are not affected by this plague."

"…"

"Don't you think this is a good opportunity to form a fellowship among the conflicting breeds, in search of a cure that rules all cures.."

"Sir Cheiftain. This is a serious situation. So don't put on such a smug look with a joke like that."

I never liked the Chieftain. Even if he was half-dead, he still wouldn't give up on his corny jokes.

Still… I don't want to see him go away either.

"Pippy. You know better than I do that you have no choice."

"…"

"… Please. Help the clan."

"…"

"If you don't, I'll tell your neighbor that you have a secret crush on his son."

"ALRIGHT! I'LL DO IT! GOD-D*MN OLD MAN!"

"Ha-ha-ha. *Cough* *Cough* Peace."

In the end, I ended up leaving my safe and cozy home in search of a cure for my home village, under the pretense of Blackmail.

My name is **Pepperin Longstock***. You can call me Pippy. Once this is all over, I'll hit that senile old man with my club. I swear.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Dungeons and Dragons owned by Wizards of the Coast**_

 _ **Fanfiction and Characters with * by: Emerald Sonata**_

* * *

 **DnD Diaries:  
~PIPPY AND QUARTER~**

 _ **-d2-  
"Meetings"**_

* * *

I didn't know where I was going. There were so many roads and too many maps for me to properly follow.

I'll be frank, I've never left my village at all. Even though I'm the only Druid in the village, all of my herbs and ingredients for healing potions were gathered from my personal garden. I've never even came five steps close to the village's main gates.

When I was little, I did have dreams of leaving the village to explore the large world. I was excited to meet new species, the humans, the elves, the dwarves, and even dragonborns. I was also eager to meet an Orc, but after hearing all those scary stories of what hey do to pretty girls, I somehow developed a phobia for them.

I was a pretty girl, even if I was a Halfling, please don't blame me.

"Uuuh. Topaz City. Topaz City. If I follow this winding road, I should be able to arrive at their city before the sun sets… But why are the landmarks so different?"

Indeed, no matter how much I looked at the map I bought from a peddler on the road, it made no sense to me.

It looked like a five year old drew it from a memory that does not physically exist. Terrible.

"… I don't want to say it."

I was lost.

But I didn't know whether or not this was good or bad fortune.

Because I suddenly tripped over a dead body on the road.

"UGYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

I had no clue what it was. But I knew it was dead.

It didn't react when I kicked it very hard and there wasn't so much of a sound. Nothing. That was what scared me the most.

I know I'm a doctor back in my village, but I forbid anyone to die on my watch. Thus, I lack experience in dealing with the dead.

"… Hello?"

Even though I knew this person was dead, I still ended up asking. I was an idiot in shock.

"A-are you alive?"

No answer. Not even a stir.

"… Um… I'm sorry for kicking you."

Nothing.

"… Excuse me."

I ended up scavenging his body, looking for any spare coins or items that may be of use to me. I know I said I wasn't used to dealing with the dead, but that didn't mean I couldn't inherit things they no longer need.

Besides, if there is one thing I learned by the afterlife – you can't take your treasures with you. I'm… merely following what my elders taught me, yes.

"Th-thank you for the offerings."

To respect this fallen body, I didn't bother to bury it. And I ran away.

"Little girl."

"UGYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!?"

The hand that was supposed to be dead caught me by the ankle. It scared the sh*t out of me, period.

I ended up falling over, spilling some of the extra potions, scrolls, and coins I gathered from the dead body. I didn't turn, I was too scared to do it.

But I felt the dead body moving, his grip still on my small ankle.

"Would you kindly—"

"PLEASE DON'T RAPE ME!"

"… I beg your pardon?"

"Heh?"

The voice that spoke to me sounded soft, gentle. It made me think of raindrops touching the smooth surface of a river stone. Or a wind chime in a summer breeze.

The grip on my ankle loosened, but did not lift off entirely. It stayed there. It felt more like, it made sure I didn't run into that dangerous spider nest that was 8 steps ahead of me.

After a gulp, I dared to look at the moving dead body.

"… I… I'm sorry?"

A boy.

A boy with white hair and a small face. He looked very young, maybe as young as me if he was a Halfling. I realized he was a Human, and judging by the clothing he wore, a tattered velvet red robe and leather wrappings, I think he was someone who studied in the Arcane Arts.

A peculiar silver quarterstaff was rolling around next to him, flipped about by the wind.

With one hand on my ankle, his other hand was holding onto a canteen. It was empty, because he held it up side down. Nothing dripped out.

"Um... Do you… have some water you could share with me?"

"..."


	3. Chapter 3

_**Dungeons and Dragons owned by Wizards of the Coast**_

 _ **Fanfiction and Characters with * by: Emerald Sonata**_

* * *

 **DnD Diaries:  
~PIPPY AND QUARTER~**

 _ **-d3-  
"Mel'on"**_

* * *

"Pheeew. I feel so refreshed."

"Don't tell me you're lost like me, Mr. Wizard."

I ended up sitting down on a log with the dead body that came back to life just from drinking regular river water. It turns out he was an adventurer and got left behind by his party to die, for what reason he didn't know.

I didn't know whether or not he was lying with that nonchalant smile on his face.

"You saved me back there, little one. I'm grateful."

"I'm 28."

"… What?"

"I'm 28 years old. I'm not a child."

"…I'm… sorry?"

I frowned and the Wizard scratched his head… rather, he scratched at the top of his hood.

I didn't like him. I don't know why I kept thinking about that, but something told me I couldn't trust this Human for one second.

Now that I look back in my childhood, I found it ironic that I would be excited to meet a stranger on a messed up adventure like this.

The second I find an opening, I'll ditch him.

"Thank you for the water. You really saved me back there. I don't know when I would have made it out alive."

"Maybe I should have left you."

"… I beg your pardon?"

"Hmm? I didn't say anything. You must be imagining things."

"..."


	4. Chapter 4

_**Dungeons and Dragons owned by Wizards of the Coast**_

 _ **Fanfiction and Characters with * by: Emerald Sonata**_

* * *

 **DnD Diaries:  
~PIPPY AND QUARTER~**

 _ **-d4-  
"Insight +5"**_

* * *

I wasn't in a hurry, but I pretended that I was. It gave me a good excuse to leave the Wizard behind.

Sadly, he didn't take the hint and ended up following me, propping his quarterstaff across his shoulder.

"Where are you going little… I mean, young lady?"

"That's just as worse as calling me a brat."

"… I'm sorry?"

I rolled my eyes. I don't know why this Wizard was so interested in a Halfling like myself. No matter how quick or swift I tried to move out of his reach, he seemed to have a way of keeping up. And I have what my Chieftain would proudly refer to as 'Halfling Dexterity'.

"If you wish to reach Topaz City, it's in the other direction."

"… H… how did you know?"

"You don't seem to be carrying much provision to head to the Ruby Sanctum or the Emerald Bay, which are more than 10 days worth of travel. The only closest city available would be Topaz. Also, judging by the smell of unique medical herbs and therapeutic incense, I believe you're a medical Druid, no?"

"… H…how?"

The Wizard smiled at me, not at all caring the dumb look of disbelief I had on my face.

"My name is **Alex Quartermain***. You may call me Quarter. May I know your name?"

"How is this answering my question? How did you know all that? Don't tell me your used Detect Thoughts on me!"

"No, no, no. I don't know that spell."

I kicked him in the shin to make him get straight to the point.

"Th-that's too cruel! Ow!"

"Stop – playing – around – with – me!"


	5. Chapter 5

_**Dungeons and Dragons owned by Wizards of the Coast**_

 _ **Fanfiction and Characters with * by: Emerald Sonata**_

* * *

 **DnD Diaries:  
~PIPPY AND QUARTER~**

 _ **-d5-  
"Strength -1"**_

* * *

"P-please don't kick me! I'll tell you everything!"

"You better."

I ended up following the Wizard, the one who called himself Alex Quartermain or Quarter for short. I had no choice, I didn't know where the h8ll I was going so I had to rely on him to guide me to the right direction.

Still, that didn't mean I couldn't kick him every now and then.

"I mean you no harm. I merely took in the details of your attire and the inventory you had at hand. Like I said, you don't have enough provisions to make it to another town. If you're heading to Topaz, it would be the most likely place to buy medical supplies for your doctor's work."

"I just don't understand wizards."

"… Should I be insulted?"

I didn't care whether or not Quarter was happy with my remark. I didn't want to do anything with him… but I won't say anything until I make it to the city.

I-I'm only using him. That is all. Yes.

"What's your name?"

"Pepperin Longstock. You can call me Pippy."

"Nice to meet you Pippy."

"SH*T!?"

"… Did you step on something?"

I slapped a hand to my mouth. I let slipped my name! I didn't want to do that!

Was he using some kind of Mind Rape spell to make me disclose my identity? I heard Wizards were capable of using a Spell call Charm. Was this the problem?

I shot him a glare and ran up ahead, making sure he was 10 steps behind me.

Somehow, that made him very upset.


	6. Chapter 6

_**Dungeons and Dragons owned by Wizards of the Coast**_

 _ **Fanfiction and Characters with * by: Emerald Sonata**_

* * *

 **DnD Diaries:  
~PIPPY AND QUARTER~**

 _ **-d6-  
"Adventurer Like You"**_

* * *

"Here we are, the Topaz City Keep."

"Good bye."

I immediately abandoned the Wizard, leaving him in my dust. The moment I saw the giant stone doors, I just made a beeline for it and didn't bother to look back.

I had a job to do and I really didn't want to get anyone involved. Also, this was a whole new world for me, I don't know who to trust. So it was safe to keep a good distance away from anyone.

By the time I arrived at the door, the guardsmen crossed their spears to block me off.

"Halt. Who goes there?"

Don't they have anything better to say?

"I desire entrance into the city. I have the coin for the entry."

"Even if you do, we can't let you in just yet."

"Oh I see. You must be under attack by questionable monsters that come at the dead of night and devour your citizens. Fear not, leave it to me to get rid of them."

"Who said anything about monsters? Didn't you read the sign?"

".. What sign?"

One of the guardsman sighed and jabbed a thumb to a wooden panel that was nailed to the log post that stood right behind him. The writing was terrible, so I had to squint to properly make sense of it.

 **'Children under 10 must not exit or enter without Parent Supervision'**

I was p*ssed off.

"Are you picking a fight with me!?"

"Hey, I don't make the rules kid. I work here."

I nodded to what the guardsman said, and I readied my club to give him my honest answer.

"Oh! Sorry about that, good sirs. I got separated from my daughter for a moment."

I blanched.

The voice that came into the conversation was the last voice I ever wanted to hear. And the words he said were dangerously loaded.

…Daughter?

I whipped around, jumping exactly 10 inches in the air to see Quarter happily standing behind me. He just waved at the guards.

"My bad, my bad. I'll do my best to watch over my daughter more carefully."

"Your daughter?"

It was the guard who asked that question. He glanced at Quarter, to me, then back to him. No matter how many double takes the guard did – Quarter looked like he was still beyond the bachelor age.

Even so, the Wizard smiled at them.

"… My high school sweetheart and I were really passionate… so… yeah."

I felt like killing myself.


	7. Chapter 7

_**Dungeons and Dragons owned by Wizards of the Coast**_

 _ **Fanfiction and Characters with * by: Emerald Sonata**_

* * *

 **DnD Diaries:  
~PIPPY AND QUARTER~**

 _ **-d7-  
"Diplomacy - Fail"**_

* * *

"I'm very, very, very sorry. I won't tell anyone I'm your father."

"Please drop dead."

After we 'safely' made it through the city gates, I just took Quarter around an alley and just kicked the sh*t out of him. I kept beating him until all the embarrassment inside my Halfling body was gone. Still, even though I'm panting like a dog under the summer heat – I felt it wasn't enough.

That Wizard to told a lie with a straight faced smile ended up prostrating before me for forgiveness.

"I promise I won't do it again."

"Make sure you don't. Or next time, I'll use my club."

"Yes, my queen."


	8. Chapter 8

_**Dungeons and Dragons owned by Wizards of the Coast**_

 _ **Fanfiction and Characters with * by: Emerald Sonata**_

* * *

 **DnD Diaries:  
~PIPPY AND QUARTER~**

 _ **-d8-  
"Dream"**_

* * *

"So you're looking for the King?"

"How the h8ll do you know that too?"

I was merely window shopping in the city of Topaz. This was the first time I left my village, and the first time in ever setting foot into such a large walled city like this place.

Things were completely different here compared to back home. There were stone buildings and towers that were taller than the wisest of Oak Trees. Stores were covered in glass that bounced the light of the sun around. The roads were dressed in beautiful smooth rocks, even if I were to ride a carriage it would feel like traveling on flat roads.

Cultural Shock.

And just when I found a Royal Decree that was just plastered onto a posting billboard, Quarter somehow dug out the truth from me.

"If you noticed, you and I are the only people who are reading this decree from the king. Everyone else are either busy courting cute girls, picking which restaurant they want to eat at, or just shopping. You seem to be fascinated with the king."

"I-if you think I'm his secret admirer, dream on."

"Mmm. Which type of dream? The one that makes you laugh, or the one that makes you have a nose bleed."

I hit his shin with my club.

"I didn't call you my daughter!"

"Shut up!"


End file.
